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September 6, 2014 / austreberto

ebb and flow

ebb and flow

 

the average heart rate for a human is about sixty beats per minute

one beat per second

86,400 in a day

each day until you lack the strength

during which your body is receiving everything it needs

 

we do this in our sleep

 

we are professionals of living

even if it doesn’t feel like it sometimes

 

i jump from zero to one hundred in about as long as it takes me to count from zero to one hundred

 

starting over fourteen times

because i wanna get it right

 

because i said it funny

counted too fast

skipped numbers

repeated the same ones

and i always giggle at sixty nine

 

it’s a low slow rolling tide

this build up

 

is this a panic attack

or just my body’s way of reminding me that i’m still alive

 

that this heart is sometimes too strong for its own good

 

it’s why at its worst

on a good day

it feels like this breastplate is about to burst

with our kick drum heartbeats

and we’ve got tickets ya’ll

 

front row

center stage

 

this

this is live

but i only brought one earplug

so imma stick it in my left ear

because that’s my my good side

and i’ll keep my right side to the ground

because that’s how you sense danger from a mile away

though danger saw you from two

 

having the upper hand is difficult when your reach is so limited

fingertips grazing top shelf items of what you need the most

 

so you dance with ballerinas

tip toeing over the minefields that you planted yourself

 

you knew this was going to happen someday

that misstep that caused you to fall was rehearsed

because you wanted to stop trying so hard to succeed

that you forgot how to live

 

 

if that’s how it’s gonna be

then i don’t want to try so hard anymore

 

i just wanna simply be

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