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April 4, 2015 / austreberto

your signature here (day four)

your signature here

i am taking this moment to be still with myself

to progress in place
to gather my thoughts
to simply be
to not over think
second guess
doubt
or ruffle my feather unnecessarily

i will rest when i need to
take a step back
or to the side
to rethink
not over think

to try again
or
when needed
to give up

some battles are not worth having
some roads are not meant to be taken

let us make our peace treaties with ourselves
with the monsters within ourselves that we hold to a different standard
because you’d feel this kind of anger too if you were caged this much
if someone was this ashamed of you

let us exhale this exhilaration

not explode over the final straws
but release this chaos we boiled over the fires we started ourselves then blamed others who pushed us to that point
because it’s never our fault

hi
you must be new here
yes
it is never our fault
and that makes it so easy to be a fuck up

yes
to error is human
but i don’t think god intended us to run with that design flaw

let us not take advantage of how we were created
in being an asshole
by choice

let us make better choices for ourselves
hell
let us make better choices for each other

let us collectively be better together
because we’re all in this together

if we weren’t we would only befriend hermit crabs on our islands of isolation

the sign reads
do not enter
no trespassing
beware of dog
will shoot on sight
in parentheses
unless you’re selling thin mints

bring me deliciousness of the heavens by the sleeve full
because i’ve got this hunger that can only be satisfied by girl scouts

and i know
that sounds bad
and it is

i tend not to think before i speak

my design flaw
verbal diarrhea and verbal vomit at the same time

when we first met
i wanted to tell you how beautiful i thought you were
and that i could picture so much between us

a future
a life
happiness
but i tend to get caught up in the moment before i realized that this was the first conversation i had with you
but you smiled
and found it charming

your design flaw
your inability to start conversations with strangers

we were no longer strangers after that

had a funny story for our children that we would never have together
but we could pretend

and we could pretend we no longer carried these monsters

that we were perfect
and blameless

sign the peace treaty

forgiven

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